WV Mel's Story

[WV Mel]

I have been running around here answering posts and reading them but really not sharing a lot about myself. I think it is time to start my story. Now mind you, it is not very interesting at all. I really lead a boring life. But it all started back in 1963 when I was born three months premature........

I was what they called a "change of life" baby. I was the eighth child of the family, born when my mother was 42 years old. My oldest sibling is 25 years older than me and there is 8 years between me and the last child born before me. Being the baby of the family and also being sickly for the first few years of my life, I was basically given anything I wanted. I had a wonderful loving family. I have been so blessed. We didn't have a lot but we had everything we needed.

After the first couple of years, I started putting on weight. I was always the biggest kid in the class. I was the token "fat" friend. I was the "jolly" person. Everyone loved me. There were a few of the mean kids that called me names and made fun of me but not really that many not enough to make me want to kill everyone later in life. I had all kinds of "boy" friends but NO boyfriend. I guess I was 16 years old before I met an older man (all of 18) who actually seemed to like me. We had a semi relationship for a few weeks until I went to visit realatives for a week and came home to find him seeing someone else. My heart was broken. This was my first love.

Moving on toward my graduation day... I attended one prom (by myself) and I graduated with honors in the top 10 of my class. (Hey no dates means plenty of book time) I loved to travel and I loved music. So I started going to concerts and traveling as much as I could. I really enjoyed those days. But now it was time to settle down and get a job. Of course I was the perfect employee. No husband or significant other meant Melissa had plenty of time to devote to work and boy have I had my share.

Eventually, a friend of mine from school comes back in my life and she is a fun loving person who didn't give a crap about nothing and she wanted to fix me up with a neighbor of hers. I told her no, I am not having a blind date. She told me that this guy had seen me around and wanted to meet me. What! Someone actually asked to meet me? After much hard deliberation I finally agreed to meet him. Now there was a bit more to this story than it seems. It just so happens that this guy is 10 years younger than me. (By the way.... at this time I am 28 years old so he was legal) You know it is a funny thing, the only guys that ever seemed to be interested in me were either way too old, way too young or just plain gross.

[Lucie]

Wow Mel ! how can you say it is a boring story?... You write so well...I wish you'll write more...I want more...you are a wonderful person my friend and I am glad you are now ready to share a bit more of yourself...and I am really inspired by the fat you've lost...I wanna hear /read more about how and when you did it. Have a wonderful night and tks for a very great story sharing.
Hugs from Quebec xxxxxxx
Lucie

[WV Mel]

PART 2:

Well, as I said, I agreed to meet him and I actually enjoyed myself. On our first date we went bowling. How safe is that? We continued to get together and talk to each other for a while. I really enjoyed his company and even though I was really bothered by the age difference I fell in love. I kind of think that part of me was just scared that I would never find anyone to love me and I let that take control.

We were married and life was wonderful (for a few years) We were the odd couple. I, older than him, weighing well over 300 pounds and him weighing in at around 130. I have to give him credit, he did like big women. He wasn't ashamed of me and I was always the one worrying about what people thought.

We had been married about eight years before things starting falling apart. We wanted children and that just wasn't happening. I did manage to get pregnant but miscarried, and that was an awful ordeal. We tried everything but it just wasn't happening. I think that is when everything started falling apart. Of course I was told, lose weight and it will be easier for you to conceive. I have tried so many diets and ways to lose weight it's not funny. But the thing was, my husband didn't want me to lose weight. When I would attempt it, he would want to eat out all the time or want me to cook special meals. He was very jealous and I think he wanted to keep me fat so no one else would look at me.

Eventually he met up with someone that had several children and was closer to his age, and started seeing her. When I finally found out he left. After a couple of weeks he decided he wanted me back and begged for forgiveness. Well, of course I loved him and wanted to give him another chance. He came back home and we were happy again for a while. (about a year) Then it started all over again. He wanted kids, I couldn't seem to produce them. He ended up leaving again with the same woman. This time it went through to a divorce and he married her immediately. Of course I was devasted. He was my whole world. I actually managed to lose about 50 pounds after he left from pure misery.

[WV Mel]

Part 3

After a while, I finally decided to start living again. After all I had lost some weight, I got my hair styled differently I was feeling pretty good about myself. In the little town where I live, each year they have a Native American Powwow. It takes place for a weekend and I am part Native American myself and am interested in the culture, so I attended. While I was there I met my ex-husbands cousin (who had recently been going through a similar situation himself) and we talked for a while. My ex saw us together and got jealous. Next thing I know he shows up on my doorstep, having left his wife and crying and pleading for me to take him back again. He sure piled it on thick. Telling me how much of a mistake he had made and that I was the only woman he really loved. This persisted for a few weeks until he finally wore me down and I gave in. He filed for divorce and was living with his mom (I wouldn't let him move back in with me, which is what he wanted) This went on for six months until the divorce was final. In the meantime, I gained back that 50 pounds I had lost. Yep, he was back at his lets go out tonight tricks.

In the meantime, he has started acting a little strange. Now mind you after all I have been through you don't trust so willingly. I got suspicious. I was right. Again he was sneaking around and seeing someone else. At least this time it was someone different. He even had the nerve to tell me that he loved us both and he didn't see why he couldn't have us both. Well.... out he goes again and this time for good! (and good riddance!)

Of course, being in the state of mind that I was, I started losing weight again. At this time I discovered Low Carb. This was something I could do. Right after I started low carbing, I found out that I had to have a total hysterectomy. My hormones were so out of whack the doctor said that losing weight might not be too easy for me. That was all I needed to hear on top of everything else... I had the surgery and during my 10 weeks off work and my recovery, I continued eating my low carb way. By the time it was all said and done, I had lost 75 pounds! I was a new woman when I returned to work.

[WV Mel]

Part 4:

After returning to work and feeling damn good about myself, it didn't take long to get into the old mind games people play on you. Co-workers started commenting on my diet. They started bringing in goodies for me and saying "just one won't hurt" I allowed the co-workers sabatoge my plan and I eventully gained all the weight back.

I coasted along with the feeling that I was never going to be able to lose weight. I was always going to be alone and that was that. Then in 2006 I was invited to vacation at the beach for a week with my sister and her family. I had a few months notice so I decided to try low carb again. I managed to drop about 25 pounds fairly quickly and then we went on vacation. Of course I didn't stick to plan (I was on vacation people!) After returning home, I woke up one day and my eyesight was really blurry. I only wear glasses to drive but at this time I could see perfectly at a distance but up close was nearly impossible. I knew something was terribly wrong. Diabetes runs in my family and I had my sister check my blood sugar with her meter. It was 560! It was at that moment I finally realized that if I didn't do something I was going to die. That was all there was to it. I had to finally admit that I HAD to lose weight and get healthy before it was too late.

I went on the low carb diet again, this time with a vengence. I had to see a doctor in a few months and I wanted to have things under control before I did, or I would be on diabetes meds along with the blood pressure and cholesterol meds I was already on. Within a couple of weeks of changing my eating habits, my vision corrected itself. Thank goodness! I even had my eyes examined and the doctor told me I was lucky to have taken control as quickly as I did since it did no permanent damage.

By the time I went to my regular doctor and had blood work performed, my blood sugar was stabalized and I didn't have to go on meds for diabetes. It is now controlled by diet. In the following months I have continued to stick pretty close to my low carb plan and have managed to "release" (for you Rob) 125 pounds. At my last visit, my doctor took me off of one blood pressure med completely and changed another one. He said that in January, if I am still doing good he may take another one away. All of my blood work turned out perfect! He also gave me the go ahead to start an exercise and strength training program.

[WV Mel]

Part 5:

This brings me to where I am now. I am not professing to be 100% on plan all the time. I have strayed far off the beaten path more than a time or two. Hell today was a very stressful day and I have ate so much junk food and no exercise whatsoever. But I will be back on track tomorrow, I promise!

I have finally realized that I am the one that has to do this. Although I need all your encouragement, advice and support, you choose not to reach my goal for me. I am a strong, and determined woman. I will do it!

I will try to keep you posted along the way and I will leave you tonight with a couple of photos of me along this journey.

Melissa

[WV Mel]

Here are a couple more....

[WV Mel]

And finally here is me as of today 7/16/07

[Lucie]

Mel ! Thank you so much for sharing your story so generously ! I cried, I understood, I held your hand and I agreed many times. I am deeply touched by all this, in various ways...I hate your colleagues, I hate your husband, I love you, I admire you and your strenght and I think you look wonderful... wow..I wish I was better able to express my feelings right now, but I'll have to give myself a bit of time but I will come back...with god english words !!!!

I love you, I believe in you !

You are already a winner Mel !
Lucie xxxxx

[Michele]

Thank you for sharing your story...I find it so interesting when we give our power away (which I have done as well) and then how good it feels to take it back! You go girl!