Unafraid

One of the best feelings in the world, in my opinion, is when we realize that something that we thought was a huge stressful deal at one point, really isn’t at all. You have a moment where whatever fog was looming goes away and suddenly you’re made aware that all previous notions of the situation were just wrong, overdone, or completely irrelevant.
What was once such an important thing…feeling or idea to hold onto really doesn’t matter in the least, and probably never really did.

Most of the time, a feeling like this is like a heavy weight being lifted off your life, freeing your mind to worry about the things that are actually important and hold real weight. Also, many times this ‘huge’ thing probably started out as something pretty small, if you take the time to trace it back in your mind.
We have huge worries in life all the time. I don’t believe there isn’t a person alive who can say they don’t have a single worry. So, why hold onto ‘issues’ that, when placed out in the open for us to analyze, are very tiny and unimportant in the grand scheme of things?
We go day in, day out and allow small things to get on our last nerves, or send us to our boiling points, when really, why do we bother holding onto them so tightly?

I think the best thing to do is either dismiss tiny annoyances immediately, or deal with them right away (if they are issues between people). The worst thing to do is hold onto these small things. When we do, the result is that they either fester and annoy us endlessly, or even worse, stack up with other small things and grow to almost impossible sizes.
I know there is no way to instantly stop allowing ourselves to hold onto these things that really don’t matter much, or won’t matter in a week, a day, or even an hour from now. But, I think that we would all be better off if we stopped to think of things in relation to the big picture every now and then, and not let small things get between us and our happiness.

I have fallen in love with the world all over again, probably because I have learned that each person is responsible for the creation of their own atmosphere.
I live in my own little world lately, but I am careful when deciding who I should allow to enter. I surround myself with the beauty of other humans who have hearts so big and minds so overwhelmingly creative. Sorry, I’ve left the toxic behind, come find me when you find yourself.
I am learning how to appreciate everything…there once was a time when Pina-Colada slurpee’s and a freshly rolled cigarette made my entire day. Each vibe you give-out is just as important as the ones that are taken-in from others.
Have you ever noticed how a simple smile, a random compliment, or friendly “hello” from a complete stranger can take a day from being pretty shitty to one of the best days ever? I’ve noticed because I have chosen to open my eyes.
I want to run-away as often as possible, I want to read every book that exists, I want to take a small piece of everyones heart, I want to hold on to every moment I spend loving another human, I want to continuously feel every emotion that exists, so that I don’t accidentally forget just how wonderful it feels each time I get to experience happiness.
Take nothing for granted, and be grateful for the breath in your lungs…

Mouths open to speak sentences that will never be heard…a line is drawn between a phrase in the center of a thought that can’t quite remain in place.
In one ear, through the mind, and out the other…replaced by another that twists and contorts your face.
On the edge of a cliff, with your beliefs on the line, at the height of imagination, inclined to resign yourself to a failed and flawed design. Neverminding the hindsight with all of its clarity, while the ability to anticipate emotion is a rariety. Where sincerity is sacred, most are scared to share those thoughts for fear they’ll appear weak or vulnerable…unable to cope with not being “strong enough”
But that’s all bullshit…

Speak your mind and nevermind the neverminds…from time to time we just need to remind ourselves to just not give a fuck…
We are who we are and these thoughts are our own, to love and to own…to hate or condone…to be shared or left alone.

Create a fuckin scene…things are more interesting in color.

~J

2 Comments

  1. It is like we are on the same wave length! Just yesterday I drew a line in the sand with someone in my life that I felt was toxic – an emotional vampire. I always felt so drained after conversing with this person…I stopped and asked myself, “What the hell am I doing!” So I was honest and hopefully kind in my words as to why we (this person and I) could not be friends anymore. I was no longer worried about it creating a scene…but if it had, the colors would have been brilliant!

  2. a very moving and very good post jessie.

    you are a very gifted writer.

    james

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